That Time I Disgraced Myself At The Gym

So a few months after my boyfriend broke up with me, I bumped into him at a restaurant!

beyonce shock

Oh no!

He was with one hot babe, looking happy and satisfied!

nollywood-meme-dinner

Can you imagine?

Meanwhile I had been crying day and night.

sad-crying-zikoko

As if somebody died!

Eating every and anything edible.

plates of food

Kai!

And generally behaving like the world had come to an end.

die

What is this world without love?

After seeing him looking so happy and satisfied I decided to change.

thinking

If he can move on, so can I!

So the first thing I decided to do was join a gym.

Gym

And become the hottest babe in Nigeria!

When I got there I saw so many men looking delicious.

Gym Hunk Work out men

Hunks everywhere!

I decided I must impress them by force, by fire.

yasss-yes-yaaasss

Yes oh!

So first I spent some time stretching.

Stretching gym workout

Before muscle pull would come and finish me on one machine.

Right after that, I got on a treadmill.

Treadmill Simpsons

To run from my problems.

After a leisurely 3 minute stroll, I decided to increase the speed and incline.

gym

Because I’m the baddest babe.

After 2 minutes and 11 second, I was like:

try not cry

Hayyy I have entered one chance.

After 2 minutes and 53 seconds I was like:

tired

Somebody please help me.

By the time I got to 3 minutes and 5 seconds I knew I had to stop:

die

It’s all over oh!

People of God that is how I fell on the treadmill oh!

treadmill exercise fail

See shame oh!

All of a sudden I was surrounded by a few of the gym hunks, who had rushed over to see if I was okay.

kids running

Hmm could this be my silver lining?

One of them said “you should really take it easy if you haven’t done this before”.

so what ehen

Uncle is that what we are talking about now?

I even heard a few laughing.

shame

Will this shame never end?

When I finally stood up, I saw my ex staring right at me!

davido-crying

HAYYYYYYYY!What is this one doing here?

Before I could collapse from shame all over again I hobbled out of that place.

running away

Na wa oh!

I have never gone back to that gym.

No

So that they can point and laugh at me abi?

And I blame it on that my useless ex boyfriend.

funke-akindele-eye-roll

Wretched guy!