1. Pick a subject matter.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472391431/wes16p5sg4yjfxmguyux.jpg)
Wealth, success etc.
Because you don’t want people to look up to you for everything. You’re not anybody’s daddy.
2. Make up ‘inspirational’ stories about your life and experiences.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472395793/me5lcdztrjewgzkk7jew.jpg)
See, truth is: no one will know if you’re lying. They were not there.
3. Prepare your faux-deep messages.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472390976/dmqivykgfaswak9dh9o5.jpg)
It’s 2015. If it’s not deep, it’s not valid.
4. Always have go-to rhymes.
“You need information to stay in formation.”
How else will you capture audience attention – on posters and in tweets?
5. Pick popular people or examples to support your subject matter.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472395791/vd5spifg1xulnwywmtii.jpg)
“The 7-star hotel in Dubai was built based on aspiration, inspiration and perspiration.”
6. Always be vague. You want to leave them thinking.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472391411/mqm7cnvbxn1yiueig1rk.jpg)
In everything you should remember, this is an elaborate con. The less details, the better.
7. Borrow an accent.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472390876/ggcg4dafagtltxmnf2tw.jpg)
A British one would be nice; but when in doubt, mix them up! The goal is confusion.
8. Use more words than you really need.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472391426/aop9golezootelsrnace.gif)
You need to work hard. = You need to embrace fully, the entirety of values behind laborious labor.
9. Contradict other motivational speakers.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472391405/twm00zcxvbnmktnbqynf.gif)
This is extremely important. People need to know you’re the smartest, most inspiring person alive.
10. Write a book. Then write 7 more books saying EXACTLY the same thing in 7 new ways.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472390976/aawxmed1y5ctjpjccnya.gif)
You know, SEO.
11. Sell yourself as a life consultant/coach.
![](https://c7684bdb45.mjedge.net/wp-content/uploads/cloudinary/v1472390976/dgoe4fipse3j7d57guox.jpg)
It’s the law of natural progression.