Sex Life is an anonymous Zikoko weekly series that explores the pleasures, frustrations and excitement of sex in the lives of Nigerians.
The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 26-year-old man with a big dick. He talks about realising how his penis size might be a problem for him and the insecurities that come with having a big penis.
What’s the most significant thing that happened on your first sexual encounter?
I realised I might have a big penis. The first time a woman mentioned my penis was big, I thought she was lying and just wanted to stroke my ego. It’s not like I knew what the average size of a penis was, and I wasn’t out there comparing my dick sizes to that of men I met on the road. It didn’t click till 2014.
I was 19 years old and in university at the time. I had a serious girlfriend that was a year older than me in age and class.
One day, when my girlfriend came to the house, she climbed on top of me and said we should have sex. She’s someone with very high energy, so I wasn’t surprised she did that.
We started with foreplay, and I tried to make her good before I did whatever would pleasure me.
On penetration, her face turned reddish. I got a bit scared and asked her if she was okay. She said I should keep going slowly. As my strokes slowly increased, she passed out.
What happened?
I got her some water, and she just lay there till she eventually had the strength to go home. We didn’t bring up the passing out incident until she got home.
When I asked her how she was doing, she just kept talking about how big my dick is and how she couldn’t believe I was hiding all that with my small body. That was when I realised that my penis might become a problem in the future.
Did it become a problem?
Not with her, but unfortunately, the relationship didn’t last longer than a year. I started sleeping with people I wasn’t in a relationship with. When you have a big penis, there’s a lot of trial and error involved because you’re not sure whoever you’re sleeping with will be able to handle it. When I was 22, there was this babe that I reconnected with.
While we were hanging out, she told me about all the fantasies she wanted me to fulfil and I agreed. She sounded like she knew what she wanted and I was ready to give it to her. We set up a date to meet.
Immediately she entered my house that day, we went down to business. When she pulled down my briefs, her face was shocked. Then she went, “Is it inside my vagina this thing is going to enter?” I thought she was joking and trying to ease the tension. Before I knew it, she had started putting her clothes back on. She asked me to escort her out and I did. I couldn’t believe what had just happened.
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Didn’t you warn her?
I did. I always try to warn women about the size of my penis. But they usually think I’m lying or trying to hype up my dick. Meanwhile, I just don’t want a situation where someone will collapse on my dick or leave upon sighting it.
That’s why my solution to that problem is to send pictures and videos beforehand. So they can realise what I’m working with and what they’re going to see when we choose to have sex.
And then if they say they want it?
I still hold back my expectations. Most of them agree to it online, but once they come face to face with it, they chicken out. If you don’t have high hopes, you won’t be disappointed when it eventually doesn’t work out.
It’s kind of annoying. I don’t have control over the size of my penis, and with the exclamations and comments some of the women make, it makes me feel like I should reduce its size. Constantly getting blue balls because of something that is definitely beyond my control is very destabilising. I sometimes wish I had a smaller penis.
So, are you still doing trial and error?
Luckily, not anymore. I found a partner who actually loves the size of my penis. She says the length and girth is perfect for her and fills her up very well. I feel our relationship can evolve to something more than just sex.
What then would you rate your sex life on a scale of 1-10?
I’d give it an 8. As much as there are bad times, there’s also some good times.
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