The Nigerian experience is physical, emotional, and sometimes international. No one knows it better than our features on #TheAbroadLife, a series where we detail and explore Nigerian experiences while living abroad.
This week’s Abroad Life tells the story of Bolu (23) who, after a sudden “miracle,” left Nigeria for New York in less than a week to start a new life. What she didn’t anticipate was that she’d have to live in fear of deportation three years after her big move. She talks about how Trump’s victory has become a source of anxiety for her as a black immigrant.
Where do currently live, and when did you leave Nigeria?
So I live in New York now, Long Island, specifically. I left Nigeria in 2021
Was there a particular reason you decided to move abroad?
It was unexpected. I did not even know we were going to travel because everything happened in about four days. My mom just called me from school and said, “Bolu, we’re travelling this week.” I was so surprised. It felt like a miracle but it turns out that my dad had been working on bringing me, my mom, and my siblings to New York for a minute.
LOL. I thought people only moved to New York to chase Broadway dreams.
I know, right? But the only reason my dad chose New York was because his sister lives here. He’s been in New York for 12 years now, so it felt right to join him there. Though, I was a bit sad when we had to leave Nigeria.
Ah ahn. Why?
I was already in my second year of university in Nigeria, and I wanted to finish my undergraduate degree there, and then probably chase a master’s degree abroad.
I was also sad because I had a tough time making friends at university and only started meeting amazing people when the travelling thing worked out. I’ve been trying my best to maintain those relationships, but it’s been really hard especially because of the time difference –there are people who think that I stopped talking to them because I travelled and I don’t know how to explain to them that it’s not my fault. I don’t want to be calling people when they are already asleep.
The time difference wasn’t the only thing stopping me from keeping those relationships; I was also having a tough time adjusting to New York. Even though I wasn’t eating a lot, I was putting on so much weight. Some friends in Nigeria started asking me why I looked pregnant, so I had to cut them off from my life because their comments were getting to me.
I’m sorry about that. Is there anything you like about living in New York?
To be clear, I don’t live in New York City. I live in the suburbs, which are the less noisy side of New York. But I like where I live; it’s not too crazy, and I like the serenity and diversity.
Do you miss anything about Nigeria?
I miss my friends and extended family. New York can be quite lonely, and If it were up to me, I wouldn’t want to be here, but I just have to make the most of the opportunity. People are not so nice here too. You can depend on people in Nigeria, but everyone is self-centred here.
Another thing I don’t like about living in New York is that your life will be terrible without a car. I don’t have a car yet, so I know how terrible figuring out the transportation system can be. I do everything I can to reduce the possibility of taking the bus, even if that means calling my aunt to help me. Don’t even get me started on the weather, they have extreme temperatures here. It’s either too hot or too cold.
Sounds like a lot. Maybe the transportation system is something your new president can fix.
Oh please, I feel sad that man won the elections. Some Nigerians are supporting him, and It’s very weird to me because I expect them to know better. This man is just like Tinubu. Actually, he’s even worse, because his policies are terrible, especially for women. Once he resumes office, he’s going to ban abortions, regardless of the situation, and that includes incest or rape. Not to mention the fact that he’s a racist. I’m here legally as a permanent resident, but I’m still worried about what Trump being president means for me as an immigrant. He isn’t a fan of immigrants, and that makes me very anxious.
I’m sorry you feel that way.
Thank you. My aunty was telling me about the paroles that used to happen the last time he was in office. She said they used to deport Hispanic people without caring to ask whether they were in the country legally or illegally. If that’s true, I don’t know what would happen to me now that he’s president again. I’m going to start taking my green card everywhere I go in case Trump’s people stop me randomly to ask if I’m here legally. People who look like me can get deported easily if they don’t have any proof to show them that they’re here legally.
Aside from the fear of deportation, I’m also terrified as a black person because the cops might get more violent towards black people and all people of colour. I’m even more terrified about what this means for me as a woman; It’s been just a few days since Trump won the election, and there are already sexist videos from his supporters spreading around. You can already hear his male supporters saying things like “Your body, our choice”.
That’s insane
There’s an abortion ban in Texas currently, and we see news of young girls dying. There’s a particular case where a girl died because the pregnancy was harmful to her body but since it wasn’t legally allowed to abort it, she lost her life, and the baby died too. This will be the reality of more women moving forward, and that’s why I’m happy this is his second and last term in office.
I’m guessing you’re more of a Kamala fan.
Oh yes. I know she announced her candidacy late, but her policies were not as bad as this other guy’s policies. If I could vote, I’d have voted for her
Let’s go back to less political stuff. Have you made new friends now?
Yeah, I’ve made a few friends. I work now, so I get to meet my age mates. So far, the number of friends I have isn’t that much, but I’m okay with that. It’s not about the quantity; I guess it’s about the quality. I also can’t complain because managing school and work is intense enough.
Do you have any plans to move back to Nigeria when you’re done schooling?
Oh, yes, I will. America is just an opportunity that I’m utilising. Once I’m comfortable, I’ll move back home by God’s grace.
On a scale of one to 10, how happy are you with your life abroad?
Okay, I’ll say seven because it could be better. I’m still grateful to God for the opportunity; It has had a lot of impact on my life, both positively and negatively but I think this is just what needs to happen at this stage of my life. It has forced me to grow up, and things are better now than when I first moved so I’m grateful.
Do you want to share your Abroad Life story? Please reach out to me here. For new episodes of Abroad Life, check in every Friday at 12 PM (WAT).
