1. When your make-up artist is testing you a day before and burns your lips.
People of God, cry with me.
2. When you wake up and discover you’re on your period.
WHAT THE FUCK?
3. When your junior sister says she can’t find the gold jewelry she kept for you.
Where did mummy see this one?
4. When your husband-to-be is nowhere to be found on the wedding day.
Hope this nigga is not about to bail on me?
5. When you’re putting on your wedding dress and you hear a tear sound.
I’m finished today o!
6. When you’re on your way to church and the car spoils.
My enemies are at work!
7. When your bridesmaids start calling you that they can’t make it.
What a betray!
8. When your husband comes late and now forgets the ring again.
See mumu husband o!
9. When your dad comes late for your wedding.
Just disappear from here, sir.
10. When the hall owners come and lock you for their 200k balance.
Please sir, you need to calm down o!
11. When your makeup artist is not on seat to touch up your face.
After I’ve paid sitting money?
12. When the chairs are not enough and you see the people standing looking at you like:
You would have brought your chairs from home sha!
13. When your husband’s relatives now choose that moment to let you know how they feel about you.
You people are mad and you don’t have anyone to tell you!
