There are people who eat food out of necessity, and then there are full-blown food stans. They walk, breathe and see food. If you want to kidnap them, just go where the food is at.
If this is talking to you directly, then these stages of hunger shouldn’t be new to you.
1. Anger and irritation
You’re just getting angry anyhow. A hungry man is an angry man after all. If anyone does something to pepper your body, you can even bite them.
2. Weight loss
Their jeans suddenly fit and you’re saying “body goals”? You don’t know the flat stomach is as a result of hunger? Nothing else.
3. Confusion
Suddenly words cease to make sense, except it’s “food”. Even instructions like “Go” becomes “come” at this stage.
4. Heightened sense of smell
That’s when your nose becomes extra sensitive like that of a rat. You’ll begin to perceive fried chicken inside the toilet.
5. Reflection
At this point, you begin to remember all the times you had food all around and you probably wasted it. If you can just see a plate of amala now, you’ll change your ways.
6. Forgetfulness
You become forgetful. Even if your destiny helper asks for your account number now, you cannot remember because hunger has colonised your brain. Chai.
7. Near madness
It’ll be doing you as if if you don’t eat in the next minute, you’ll go mad. If you’re the friend of a foodie, avoid them at this point.
8. Joy
There’s happiness and then there’s joy. The joy foodies feel in their stomach at the sight of food cannot be explained. That’s if they don’t die before the food arrives.
Send this to a fellow foodie, let them feel seen.
