Are you a pharmacist in Nigeria? Chances are that you are overworked, underpaid, and always tired. To make things worse, there are unrealistic expectations from home. This is because you are a “professional.” Does this sound like you?
Come along as we make a list of things Nigerian apothecaries are genuinely sick and tired of.
1) Paying dues:
How much is the salary that you are asking me to pay for this and that every time? Young pharmacists dues? Building levy? Enough is enough, please. I don’t earn enough to pay for anything. You people should pay me “I am suffering dues.”
2) My daughter too is a pharmacist:
Daddy, please. Buy your paracetamol and go, I don’t get paid enough to listen to these stories. Oga hasn’t paid me since last month.
3) I know my body:
Sorry ohh. So, why did you now come to the pharmacy? Let your body tell you what to use. Don’t stress me please, I am reading for IELTS.
4) Come and take N400,000 for your license:
See as I set, I cannot waste. Please, don’t stain my white. When you have meaningful money, let me know. Thanks, and bless.
5) Do you sell recharge card?
Can you kindly not be unfortunate? Please and please. Let us respect ourselves this year.
6) I need medicine to flush my system:
God, why have you forsaken me? This affliction has risen more than once.
7) N98,900 locum:
For God so loved the world. Why do you want to do this to me? Don’t you fear God? After removing tax and paying dues, what’s left?
8) Repping for Nigerian companies:
Carry drugs and jump buses? Still wear a starched shirt with a tie under the hot sun. Oluwa, please.
9) This is the best brand:
What we say: This is the most effective brand. You should buy it.
What we mean: Please, I have a target to meet. Buy the drug. Even me, I can’t afford to buy it.
10) Aunty nurse:
Firstly, who is your aunty? This is a Pharmacy pls.
11) When I was your age:
“You people like money too much. When I was your age, we chased experience and knowledge.” – Elder that wants to pay you N50,000 per month.
12) Stocktaking:
The ghetto. The worst.
13) I want to buy counting Vit.C:
*Sigh*
14) Pharmacist can fall sick?
No, they don’t fall sick. That’s because their first name is Augmentin 1g and their last name is Rocephin.
15) You people have plenty of money:
