Someone, please, put Nigeria and her leaders in a firefighter suit right now. They’re trying to quench the fire on us hot babes with a large hose.
At first, we thought it was just bants and they would get their act together. But we’re three months into 2024, HERtitude is mere weeks away, and they’re still moving like insanity is their middle name.
While they act like anything but their age, here’s our hot babe playbook to make sure you keep the fire burning while we plan the hottest party of the year for girls only.
Get a mantra
A little insider secret from a self-proclaimed hot babe: if you stand in front of your mirror for ten minutes a day and chant “I’m a hot babe” six times, you’ll become one. Once you step outside, other people will know a hot babe has arrived.
Believe in your sauce
As long as the sun shines and the moon comes out at night, you’re the hottest babe to ever exist, and you better believe it. If you don’t believe in your hotness, how would other people believe in it?
Do what makes you happy
Love who you want, wear what you want, and do what you want. As long as no one’s getting hurt by it, you should definitely do it. If anybody has anything to say about it, clear them and report to us. We’ll take it up from there.
Get your money up
As a hot babe who has stared into sapa’s eyes before, I’m here to tell you that you need to get your money up. It might take a while, and it won’t be the easiest thing, but you need to start making money moves before sapa and his siblings pour ice-cold water on your hotness.
Take care of yourself
Fan your flames and make sure you’re burning as bright as you can. The only way to maintain your hot babe status is to take care of yourself and love yourself. If that means cutting off people with bad vibes, then so be it.
But make room for other hot babes
The only thing you’re allowed to pit against each other is amala and semo, and that’s because amala would win every single time. You’re not allowed to pit hot babes against each other or let people pit you against other hot babes. If you do, your hot babe card will be revoked.
You think we’re playing? Just try it and see.
Come for HERtitude
It’s the biggest gathering of hot babes on this planet. If people see you at HERtitide, they won’t have the mind to think you’re anything BUT a hot babe. So, you need to get your ticket now.
Stock up on fans
Don’t get it twisted; they’re not for you. They’re for the people around you, so they can cool down when your heat becomes overwhelming. And it will.
