Sometimes, people shoot their shots at you. Which is nice and all, but they are not your spec and you’re not exactly interested. You want to dodge the shot but you don’t want to seem like an asshole. You also don’t want it to end in tears for them, because you’re nice. What do you do?
1. Tell them you’re impotent
This is sure to have them running away from you.
2. Say you’re battling spiritual issues
Because who wants to sleep with somebody possessed by legion?
3. Mention that you’re treating an STD
Just say it casually during a conversation. If they still stay, it means they truly love you.
4. Tell them your pastor said you should not date
Although they might come away thinking you don’t have sense.
5. Tell them you’ll soon relocate abroad
And you can’t do long-distance. Maybe God will hear your lie and answer your prayers.
