Growing up in a Nigerian home means that there are certain things you must NEVER do. One of this includes singing certain types of songs. If you love yourself, you’ll read this list and take the advice we have to give.

1. If I Die Young by The Band Perry

We know that you have grown old and you don’t fear anything again. But your parents still have a lot of fears. So if you love yourself, please don’t ever sing this song at home. Why? The lyrics speak for themselves:

If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song

If I Die Young

2. Jailer by Asa

Yes, Asa falls into the category of artistes accepted by Nigerian parents. But see ehn, one time I sang this part at home:

I’m in chains you’re in chains too
I wear uniforms and you wear uniforms too
You’re a prisoner too Mr Jailer

I have fears you have fears too
I will die, you sef go die too

That was all the ammunition my father needed to say that I was possessed, singing songs about being a prisoner and wanting to go to jail and die. Why couldn’t I sing songs about being rich? Why do I like to curse myself? See ehn, it was an experience I will never forget.

3. If I Die (Make You No Cry For Me) by Da Grin

Imagine singing this in front of your Yoruba parents. Do you really want to die? They just might assist you with small transport fare to meet your God.

4. Everything by Naira Marley

Especially, toba doko malole or whatever that death sentence of a song is called. It’s like confessing your atrocities, because your parents will then ask you how you know what an oko is. Aren’t you supposed to be holy and pure?

PS: The only oko I know is farm. Don’t corrupt me, dears.

5. The entire discography of Saint Janet.

Saint Janet - American Swagger - CD | African Bargains

Not sure if any young person still sings this madam today, but if you’re planning to, it might be time to perish that idea. It will likely end in tears.

6. Everything by Obesere. In fact, the name Obesere is forbidden in a Nigerian home.

Abass Obesere - Apple Juice - Video CD | African Bargains

I’m so sure that this man’s return must have triggered anxiety in Nigerian parents. To them, he is nothing but a corrupting influence and their holy children will be tainted. Remember how they hid his tapes from you back then? They probably don’t know that you will grow up to become an Obesere intern. Sha don’t sing his song near them.

Did I leave any song out? Tell me in the comments!

You should read this too: 13 Things Nigerian Parents Say Instead Of “Sorry”

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