“Never Give Up”

What if the person is doing rubbish? Is it not better to just give up and sleep?

“Everyone is special”

This one is a big lie. If everyone is special, then what does “special” itself mean? Sometimes, we need to call the bluff of these aspire-to-maguire speakers.

“Follow your passion”

This one sounds cute until you realise that Dangote has no passion for cement. Also, it’s rich people advice. Our own theory is “follow your stomach, make hunger no kill you”.

“You can be whatever you want to be”

This isn’t bad advice per se, but we’re sure it’s the kind of problematic advice that made someone like Buhari keep trying until he became the president of Nigeria. We all know how that story ends.

“What’s meant for you will not pass you by”

Maybe if life was a movie. But in real life, if you don’t hold what’s meant for you tight, sorry for you.

“The patient dog eats the fattest bone”

LMAO. Why should you end up with a bone after so much patience? Is it not better for the patient dog to just go and buy food?

“No girl will choose six packs over six cars. So stop gyming and work hard.”

There are millions of people who don’t work out and are still poor. It’s better to have one, at least.

“What an elder can see sitting down, small children cannot see from on top of a tree”

If we call this witchcraft now, they’ll say we should keep quiet. What else can make an elder see better than a child?


NEXT READ: How To Make It As a Nigerian Motivational Speaker


OUR MISSION

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.