The best gifts are those that come straight from the heart. What better way to show a Nigerian you care about them than by gifting them these eight things.
Agbado, cassava, ewa and garri
Everyone knows the economy is hard, and December is expensive. These foods will be especially useful in the 54 days before salaries are paid in January.
Gallon of petrol
Imagine spending your holidays in heat and darkness, or queueing long hours at the fuel station, because NEPA chose to be unfortunate. If you really love someone, you should save them that stress by adding 25 litres of petrol to their hamper.
Laxative
A packet of Flagyl shows you’re thinking ahead. You don’t want your loved ones spending Christmas eating and New Year’s purging.
Broomstick
With the current hikes, who really wants to spend money they don’t have on transportation? Do someone a favour this season and gift them a magic broomstick. That way they won’t have to worry about traffic or “higher prices due to increased demand”.
Anointing oil
Because after flying around on broomsticks, you’d probably need cleansing. We also need to cover ourselves with anointing so sapa and shege will release us from their chokehold in 2023.
Visa
After the suffering we faced in 2022, the only worthy compensation would be a British or Canadian visa. If you can’t gift someone a visa, at least, give them dollars or pounds. Not every year cornflakes and corned beef, abeg.
Significant other
If there’s one thing we should achieve as a nation, it should be reducing the number of people on the streets.
PVC
A reminder that after all the holiday enjoyment, they should come out and vote in February 2023.
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