This is a fact: Nobody should ever be caught eating pawpaw. We should have known that Nigeria was indeed a terrible place right from when we were kids when teachers would make us sing “Everybody likes pawpaw”. The dishonesty. Nobody likes pawpaw.

Have you ever seen pawpaw flavoured juice?

So if someone looks at you, in all your majesty, and decides that pawpaw is the fruit you deserve, you should realize that it is a declaration of war. Here are some of the steps you could take to oppose such attacks.

1. Run

Honestly, just run. If someone offers you pawpaw, it’s code for “I want to poison and kill you because I have decided that you are my mortal enemy.” If you cannot fight, drop the pawpaw and run. Save your life.

2. Hide

Chances are, it’s probably too late for you to run already. They probably already have you surrounded. So just find somewhere to hide. Hide until you’re sure they’re gone and you’re safe. Then you can begin to plan an exit strategy.

3. Fight them

If you see someone approaching you with pawpaw and you’re confident of your fighting abilities, get in position for a brawl. They are your enemy and your enemy must be conquered.

4. Scream for help

At this point, there’s no time to be shy. Cry for help. You need it.

5. Just start begging

If it comes down to this, what else can you do?


Since we’re on the subject of feeding abominable foods, check this out:

8 Unbelievable Things Nigerians Actually Eat

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