There are lots of books on how to raise a son, but none on how to be the perfect Nigerian mother-in-law to your son’s wife. That’s why we have taken it upon ourselves to answer this clarion call and provide you with the tools needed to be the most hated sought-after Nigerian mother-in-law.
Treat your son like an infant
We all know he’s not capable of doing basic chores even though he’s an grown man, so you must make his wife go above and beyond to make up for his inadequacy.
Never beat the Oedipus Complex allegations
Since you’re your son’s first love, anyone that has come to take a place in his life as mother wife needs to come correct. She has to walk like you, talk like you, cook like you, and even dress like you.
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Bond with his wife over non-enjoyment things
How dare you attempt to get to know his wife over things like spa dates and sleepovers? You don’t need such softness in your life, YOU’RE A WAR! Act like it! Both of you should bond over pounding yam at 3 a.m. because that’s what real women do!
Give her ridiculous tests
Your daughter-in-law may have thought that graduating from school meant no more tests, but she’s wrong! Test her till you can test no more. Back in the day, they tested by offering the daughter-in-law money to leave their son, but unfortunately, these days, dollar prices have gone up but I trust you can find another way.
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Compete, don’t complete
Does she know you are the most important person in your son’s life? She has to. And what better way than to find ways to remind and humble her. She asks her husband for 1k? Ask for 10! You all want to enter your son’s car? Compete for the front seat and make her sit at the back. Because it’s like she doesn’t know her place. Mtchew.
Hound her for grandchildren
Having grandchildren is definitely the most important thing on your list, not less important things like building a loving home or surviving Nigeria. So, disturb her. It doesn’t matter if your son is unable to father children. She must get pregnant.
Move in with them for a while
Honeymoon phase? For here? They will like cohabitation.
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