I can’t remember what movie I gained my psychology degree from, but I do remember one of the theories I’ve been able to come up with, which is that obsessively neat people, become so, because there’s usually so much chaos around them, they cling to, and arrange the few things that are within their control.

Nigerian Constitution

Living in a dysfuntional country? Make sure your clothes stay fitted. Your house a jungle to live in? Ensure your room is paradise. Boarding school a terror to get through? Keep your side of the dorm super neat. It makes sense when you think about it.

Nigerian Relationships Ultimate Love

If you’re wondering if you make the cut as a super neat freak, look through this list to see if any of it clicks with your lifestyle:

How you look at anyone in primary school, when they step on your socks after a whole day of holy whiteness

You’re lucky my hands are too tiny to wield an axe just right now.

Doing the most and using everything but a ruler to tidy your bed in boarding school

We all know somebody like this

Losing your mind when you come back from class to see someone had sat on your bed and attempted to tidy it

‘WHO SAT ON MY BED?’

Getting a visitor at home and trying not to lose your shit when they don’t assemble the supplies in your bathroom the way you left them

After they’ll say I’m a bad person if I don’t let people into my house.

Arranging all the labels in your fridge to face one way and someone visiting disorganising your efforts

David Lyon disqualified Bayelsa

If I start cursing people now, they’ll say I’m an extremist.

Hiring a cleaner and doing double their work after they leave because you’re still unsatisfied

If you want to get something done…

When you get into a relationship with someone and they think it’s ‘cute’ to just leave their load anyhow in.your.house.

Which kain problem be this?

Fighting the urge to straighten people’s clothes when they go outside frumpy

Let me just help you do your collar

So, are you a neat freak?

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