After a long day of saying yes to capitalism, Zikoko heads home. At the bus stop, they see a familiar face.
Zikoko: Hello. Hi. Sorry, you look familiar.
Situationship: [rolls eye] No, I don’t.
Zikoko: Yes you do. I just need to remember. Your name is… your name is…
Situationship: I am not Relationship.
Zikoko: [laughs] God no, I wasn’t going to… People say you look like Relationship?
Situationship: Yes.
Zikoko: Ah no o, they must be confused. It can never be you.
Situationship: [side eye]
Zikoko: [claps] I remember. You’re Situationship. You’re internet famous. Did you know that?
Situationship: (hiss) All of that love is online.
Zikoko: No one said it was love.
Situationship: In real life, they can’t stand me, and I don’t know why. Am I ugly?
Zikoko: NO. God, no.
Situationship: So what is it? They never want me for too long. After a while, they start looking for Relationship. Who the fuck is that guy anyway? I’m better than him.
Zikoko: I don’t think it’s a guy…
Situationship:
Zikoko: Yes, absolutely, you are better than him.
Situationship: Exactly. I’m relaxed. I’m chill. I don’t make people clean their house or label things. You can have me and all the other friends you want. The point is I’m not holding anyone back. Maybe that’s why they all run along after a while.
Zikoko: Because you don’t hold them back?
Situationship: Yes, then they start acting like I sent them away. They could have just stayed. I should be enough. People who want to move to Relationship are just greedy.
Zikoko: Hmm.
Situationship: Did you say something?
Zikoko: Yes. The bus.
[points at bus]
Is the bus going your way?
Conductor: Marwa 200. Ajah 500. Undefined. Undefined – 150
Situationship: He’s going my way.
[picks up his bag]
You’re nice. Thank you for listening.
Zikoko: Mmm, you’re welcome.
