1. I already have fabric in that colour.

Carry your aso ebi and go!

2. This colour makes me look very somehow.

I look fabulous in everything but not today!

3. It’s against my religion.

We don’t believe in aso ebi!

4. I’m a socialist, aso ebi fuels capitalism and materialism.

We don’t believe in all that here!

5. I lost my ATM card and I don’t have cash.

Sorry!

6. My bank no longer exists and so my money too no longer exists.

What a shame!

7. My grandmother said she had a dream and advised me not to buy fabric for at least one year.

Before we see stories that touch!

8. We don’t attend weddings in my family.

Only graduation and burial.

9. I’ve only known you for a decade we’re not that close.

If it was up to 20 years I can understand.

10. When I wear aso ebi I can’t dance very well.

Or you don’t want me to give them Michael Jackson on that day?

11. I won’t be around for the wedding.

Whoops!

12. Aso ebi makes me fall ill.

In fact I can almost die!

13. I heard if too many people buy aso ebi the marriage won’t last.

Help me help you!

14. I actually don’t agree with this union.

Honestly you people should not marry!

15. I’m very broke!

As you are looking at me, poverty is my middle name

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Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.