I’ve done enough Sex Life interviews to know that truly great sex is not the norm for a lot of people; it’s actually the exception. All those romance movies and novels we devoured growing up lied to us.
Anyway, instead of dwelling on that needless deceit, I decided to focus on those moments that actually make sex worth it. For that, I asked a bunch of Nigerians to talk about the best sex they’ve ever had.
Tolu, 26/Male/Straight
Unfortunately, I don’t have a lot of great sex. I’d say it happens once every few months. The best experience I’ve ever had actually happened much earlier in my life.
I was still riddled with religious guilt at the time, so I went in nervous. It helped that the girl really liked me, so I didn’t have to worry too much about disappointing her.
Anyway, we started having sex and it was going okay, but she could tell I wasn’t fully in it. She thought it was her fault, but I was too busy thinking about burning in hell.
That’s how she whispered that I should trust her and went straight for my bum. She stuck a finger in and I swear, I had the most intense orgasm of my life. I still get flustered thinking about it.
Mayowa, 25/Female/Straight
I actually have great sex really often. Sure, I haven’t done too many freaky things, but it’s usually always passionate. I’ve had my fair share of terrible partners, but it’s generally fantastic.
Even at that, my recent partner still managed to top it. I like to have a bond with people before having sex — I just can’t enjoy sex unless I like my partner to some extent.
I think this last one was great because we had been talking for years, but we only just decided to go for it. It was transcendent. There was no awkwardness because I felt very comfortable with him.
It’s really hard for me to come even just once, so I’ve never really placed any emphasis on it. With him, I came three times in one session. We even made a bunch of top-tier sex tapes.
Emeka, 26/Male/Bisexual
I don’t really have great sex very often. I find it difficult to orgasm from penetration, so I just focus on my partner’s pleasure. If they orgasm, then I count that as good sex.
The best sex I’ve ever had happened during the thick of lockdown. She lived really close to my house, so I’d go for a “run” and not return home until 4 hours later.
We had crazy chemistry and always took our time to really enjoy it. I guess that’s what happens when you hook up with 30+ women — they are rarely ever in a hurry.
The violence also elevated it. She loved being slapped, choked and spanked. She’d spit on me during sex and I’d smack her across the face. It was weird, but also great.
Ada, 26/Female/Bisexual
I’ve been having great sex consistently for four months now, but this weekend was next-level. My boyfriend and I parked the car in a secret spot in our estate and started some really intensive foreplay.
Everything just felt good. There were loud moans and deep kisses. Then I rode his face and he ate me out like he was starving. I had to beg him to stop or else I’d fall off.
He’d been telling me that he’d missed me all week, but I didn’t know it was that serious until the fucking started. He went at it as if I’d been out of town for months. We even came at the same time. It was perfect.
David, 27/Male/Straight
I went to visit family at the start of lockdown and ended up getting stuck there with a mutual friend. We had met up before, but we didn’t have sex, so we were both excited to finish what we’d started.
I snuck her into the guest room and for a week, we just ate and had sex. We’d turn up the music and fuck quietly whenever we heard footsteps. The thrill of almost getting caught made it so much hotter.
There was also so much experimentation. Do you remember that grapefruit technique from the movie, Girl’s Trip? Well, she tried it until she got it right, and it was a beautiful mess.
Vanessa, 23/Female/Straight
My sex life is nothing to write home about. The only thing keeping me sexually alive right now are virtual experiences, so it’s no surprise that the best sex of my life happened over the phone.
I think it was that great because the guy wasn’t shy or cautious like straight men typically are. He was wonderfully uninhibited, so he wasn’t just saying things he thought I wanted to hear.
I know it sounds crazy, but I still get random flashbacks from it and I can literally feel the words in my body. I don’t know if it’s jazz he used, but it definitely worked.
I’m already chasing him sha. All that talk that he was talking, he must come and walk it. I just hope I’m not setting myself up for disappointment, because it will pain me.
Samuel, 22/Male/Bisexual
My best sexual experience just happened a few days ago. It was the second time I was meeting him — the first time was great, but it was nothing compared to this one.
There was music, wine and sufficient lube. He was also much more attentive to my body than the the first time. He seemed really into making me enjoy it.
Then he told to me call the shots and that just did something to my brain. We went at it as if our lives depended on it. I was so dickmatised that I almost blurted out “I love you”.
