1. 90% of the time when we walk funny, it’s because we’re trying to adjust our testicles.
We have no control over how they position themselves. It’s not our fault.
2. Pretty much every guy has low key wished he can increase the size of his penis.
Yeah. Basically we’ve considered contacting the people that send those annoying spam emails about penis enlargement.
3. We’re not as clean as most girls.
So if you see a guy who’s really clean, compliment him because there is a tiny chance that he’s doing it for you.
4. We have two voices.
Our regular speaking voice and our “Girl I like you” voice. It’s default in our factory settings.
5. We are more sensitive than you think.
Not every time macho. Sometimes we’re delicate wallflowers.
6. The sound of metal scraping on a rough surface causes physical pain that we can actually feel in our testicles.
Scratching the crown cork of a soda bottle on the ground will make any testicles in the vicinity explode.
7. We have all, at some point, fantasized about getting our nails painted.
We’ve even thought about Henna. Don’t judge us. These things look like fun.
8. Some romantic comedies are actually very entertaining but we will NEVER give them the credit they deserve out loud.
Anything with Kevin Hart gets a pass tho. Kevin Hart is awesome.
9. We don’t act like it but deep down, we want our weddings to be lit.
With the lights, cameras, cakes and every thing. Weddings are awesome! Why would we not care about ours??
10. We sit down in public a lot longer than we have to sometimes because….
….getting rid of an impromptu erection takes time.
11. We love the Snapchat flower crown filter more than we’ll ever admit.
Who doesn’t like flowers? Lol
12. We occasionally use selfie sticks.
For those days you want the perfect selfie. We will still yab any guy that actually admits to having one sha.
13. It scares the hell out of us when we want to talk to a girl we like but she’s in the company of other girls.
Why do girls like to move around in packs sef? Oya, all of you, disperse! I want to set P.
14. We have all, at least once, sang along to Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off”.
C’mon, who wouldn’t want to get down to that sick beat??
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