Generally, human relationships have rules: don’t hurt me, don’t betray me, etc. But bromances take these rules to another level. Among men, there are sets of rules generally referred to as the “Bro Code”. It probably has always existed, but it was popularised by Barney from How I Met Your Mother. No, for real, there’s an actual book about it.
Because men tend to take these things seriously, we decided to ask Nigerian men about the bro codes they’d never break. Here’s what they had to say.
1. “There’s no bro code I can’t break. Fuck men.”
2. “Don’t be trying to rough up your bro or make snarky jokes just because there’s a woman there. It’s spineless behaviour.”
3. “Bros always honour a bet. Everything is easier if I know my bro will do what he says he’ll do.”
4. “I’d never use something I was told in confidence to spite my guy if we had a spat. I wouldn’t want anyone to do that to me.”
5. “It doesn’t matter whether you make a move or not; once you tell me you like someone, I’m staying away from the person.”
6. “I can’t do genital meet and greet with someone my bro has bumped genitals with. It’s weird.”
7. “Never masturbate in your bro’s bed. You’re not an animal. Use his bathroom.”
8. “I can never snitch on my guy for anything. Nothing at all. That’s the only one I can uphold, because when it comes to things like sleeping with my guys’ babes? God forgive me.”
9. “My bro and I can never fight over a babe — who’ll get her, who likes her better, etc. Never.”
10. “Talking to, dating, or sleeping with a friend’s ex? Never. It’s weird, insane, and just all levels of wrong.”
11. “Flirting with my bro’s partner; even if it’s a joke, it’s out of bounds abeg. That’s just disrespectful.”
12. “I can’t say bad things about my bro in front of a girl, whether he’s there or not. I just can’t.”
13. “Bro codes? I don’t believe in that shit.”
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