Losing a job can be devastating on two fronts: The apparent loss of a steady income and the not-often-discussed loss of the identity tied to that job.
For many people, feelings like a sense of self-importance and success are often tied to their ability to keep jobs and earn their own living. What happens when this ability is taken away? These Nigerians talk about it.
Image by Freepik
Lolade, 33
I grew up in a polygamous home, and for much of my younger years, I dreamed of growing up and making money so I could leave home. My first job after NYSC gave me that opportunity. It was in 2014, and I was earning ₦100k. It was good money — enough to get me an apartment and make sure I didn’t have to return home.
I only enjoyed the freedom for eight months sha. My boss started hitting on me, and when I refused to sleep with him, he influenced my termination on flimsy reasons. It wasn’t just losing my job; I also lost my freedom and ability to change my life’s circumstances. I fell into depression for a long time.
I had to return home, and even though I got another job months later, it didn’t pay as well, and I didn’t get the chance to leave home again till I got married in 2020. I feel like I’d have achieved financial independence much earlier if I hadn’t lost that job.
Sola, 29
I’ve been fired from work only two times in my life, but the second one was the most painful. It was during the pandemic in 2020, and my job was the only thing going well for me at that point.
My girlfriend had broken up with me, and my dad was seriously sick with COVID. To make matters worse, I couldn’t even visit him. So, I used my job as a crutch — a way to get through each day. So, when they fired me because of “operational changes,” it felt like I’d lost everything. I suddenly had no purpose, no excuse not to break down and cry. It was a tough time for me. I crashed out for months and didn’t have the energy to job-hunt. My dad also passed away during that period. I honestly don’t know how I survived.
Akeem, 26
I lost my job after a company-wide layoff last year, and I’m still unemployed. At first, I thought I’d be fine. I had some savings to fall back on, and I don’t even have that many responsibilities since I live alone.
However, it’s more than just not having a salary. I’ve begun to doubt my skills. I’ve never had to wonder whether I’m good at what I do — my managers always praised me. But now, I’m realising maybe I’m not that great. I’ve applied to several jobs and done countless interviews, but still no callback.
It’s so bad that I’m now wondering if the layoff hadn’t been because I wasn’t performing as expected. At least, my previous employers still kept some people on the payroll. Maybe I’m just not that good. It’s a bitter wake-up call. I know I should focus more on improving my skills than feeling not good enough, but it’s difficult not to think about it.
Nosa, 29
I became jobless right in the middle of that 2023 cash scarcity when my workplace packed up, and I seriously panicked.
I’m the firstborn and don’t have anyone to turn to for financial help. I also don’t know how to beg anyone for urgent ₦2k, so I had to find a solution quickly. I’m not proud of it, but I started looking for “any work.” I’m a human resource officer, but I applied to every vacancy I could find, from cleaner to personal assistant.
I was so ashamed because I’ve recruited for people and always badmouthed applicants who applied to jobs very different from their career paths. But I was doing the same thing. I just needed the security that came with a job, knowing that money was coming at month’s end and I could take care of myself.
Five months later, I got an admin job, but the whole experience humbled me. I wasn’t above desperately looking for work just so I could afford to live without begging for money. I learned not to be so judgemental about others and the decisions they took. Anything can happen to anybody.
Evelyn, 22
I got fired a month ago for calling in sick on my birthday so I could party. Unfortunately, a coworker follows me on Instagram and saw my posts, so they reported.
The painful part is that I’ve only been at the job for a year, and my dad helped me get a foot in. I feel like I’ve failed him and destroyed his trust in me. It’s like I just threw away the one opportunity I had to show my dad that he could treat me like an adult, and I feel foolish.
Chinwe*, 27
I now believe that getting fired from your job hurts just as much as breaking up with a partner or best friend. In 2023, I was fired from one of the best jobs I ever had because the company didn’t think my department was meeting expectations.
I think I went through all the stages of grief. My work was my wife, and I couldn’t believe it was going away just like that. Then there was the anger at the company. They’d just hired me a few months prior; how could they do that? Ultimately, I had to accept it, but I felt empty all the months I was unemployed. Like I was missing out on something in life.
I have another job now, but I’m focusing on filling my life with other interests and building relationships rather than depending on work to fulfil me. The job can go at any time, so it shouldn’t be the only thing that brings meaning to my life.
*Some names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
NEXT READ: I’m a Nurse, and My Job Is Affecting My Mental Health
