Spending Valentine’s Day single? Well, so are Elizabeth* (21) and Tobi* (23), an ex-Love Life couple who were together for two years until 2022. We invited them back to talk about their break up, how they usually spent Valentine’s Day together, and how they’ll spend their first Valentine apart. This is a guide for fellow newly single people.
Why did you break up, first of all?
Elizabeth: We broke up because my head is not correct.
Tobi: I always found it funny we broke up on the 18th of November because we’re both born on the 18th of different months.
Elizabeth: I thought it was the 14th? Anyways, yeah, we broke up because we argued a lot. It felt like we both wanted things the other couldn’t give.
Tobi: Although we plan on getting back together, we want to do a lot of self-work first.
Elizabeth: But until then, bye bye to our two-year relationship.
Tobi: Two years, three months and 17 days. Don’t ask me why I calculated. Just know that I did.
Elizabeth: Problem.
How did you spend Valentine’s Day as a couple?
Elizabeth: The Valentine’s Day before we started dating, I wanted to get them a gift, but they refused vehemently.
Tobi: We were just “friends”. I was scared. Plus, I was so anti-love before we started dating. I was one of those annoying people who wore black on Valentine’s Day and stuff like that. The first one I spent with Elizabeth though, I kinda went all out.
Elizabeth: Since we couldn’t see each other on the day, they came over to my place the day before and we exchanged gifts. Tobi has safe snacks like certain brands of gummy worms and chips they ate whenever they needed to spark joy. So I went to the supermarket near my house and bought as many as I could find. I also got them a fake flower and a shirt of mine they’d been disturbing me for.
Tobi: I did a whole five senses thing. I got her the book version of her favourite movie, a night light because she’s scared of the dark, a shirt that smelt like me because I bathed it in my perfume she likes, chocolate and a teddy bear she could attach to her bag so she had a piece of me with her everywhere she went. We also exchanged cards and spent the day in each other’s presence. Although I don’t look forward to Valentine’s Day, that day with her was sweet and chill.
Elizabeth: The second year, we said we weren’t going to celebrate it. I was in another state, and it felt like too much pressure for us to do something. I took myself out to lunch, but do you know Tobi still bought me a dress?
Tobi: You’d wanted the dress for as long as I could remember.
Elizabeth: I felt bad because I didn’t get them anything in return, but it is what it is.
Now, you’ve broken up. What’s your guide to spending Valentine’s Day single?
Tobi:
Work
Valentine is on a Tuesday and you probably have a job, because I do. If you don’t have love, at least, make money. It may not keep you warm at night, but it can pay for a nice hotel with great heating.
Beg your parents for money
You’re single, but (hopefully) they’re not. The least they can do is give you some money to do something nice for yourself. Also, you’re supposed to be a testament of their love. Testament no deserve gift?
Watch sappy movies
If you’re not spending your Valentine’s Day watching all the romantic movies you can lay your hands on, what are you actually using it to do? Watch Someone Great, Mamma Mia, About Time, Entergalactic, and remind yourself that love exists — it’s just not for you.
Elizabeth:
Cook
The way to a person’s heart is through their stomach. Cook yourself some good food so your heart can be happy.
Jigsaw puzzle
I have a 500-piece jigsaw puzzle with my name on it. I’ll spend the night solving it and having a fun time. It’ll spark joy and keep my brain sharp.
Drink while scrolling through social media
I love love, and I love alcohol. So I’ll get myself a nice bottle of rum or red wine and drink while watching other people gush about their partners. It’ll give me another nice little brain boost.
