Finding your soulmate and deciding to do life with them is great, but sometimes, the happily ever after life of your dreams you once saw can begin to feel like life imprisonment. If you’re looking to add a little extra oomph to your relationship, look no further. Here’s how to spice up your relationship:
Find new ways to tell them you love them
Tattoo their face on your face, buy a billboard space and announce to the world that your baby is bad, good, and all the other things you may ever need. Don’t just tell your baby you love them; show it, too.
Find something to bond over
Watching a new movie or shouting “ozeba” together might be great, but you know what will definitely get you and the love of your life bonding? Running from the police. Get a car, rob a bank, and become fugitives on the run. You will bond over your dislike for the police while enjoying your loot together. If Bonnie and Clyde could do it, you can too.
Get new experiences
We’re not telling you to open your relationship and give your partner and their genitals free reign. We’re just saying you should consider inviting someone else into your bed or tying your partner up and going all Christian Grey on them.
Meet your village people
We know they have a bad rep, but think about it this way: whatever they use to commit all manner of atrocities in your life can also be used to fix your relationship.
Activate your inner onigbese
You could owe your partner, your downstairs neighbour, or an elder in your church. Just make sure you take someone’s money and refuse to pay it back. Your relationship will have so much sparks in it that a live wire will be jealous.
READ: How To Be The Perfect Onigbese In Nigeria
Start an affair
Find someone you have intense sexual chemistry with and start an affair with them. Bonus points if they’re also in a relationship. All that sneaking around and back-breaking sex will light a fire in your relationship that will never be quenched.
Go on a break
Sometimes, the best way to keep the spark in your relationship alive is by throwing water on it and calling it quits. This way, when you come back together, you’ll remember how miserable life in the streets is, and your spark will never go low.