Love comes, love goes. But just because your best friend has left the shores of Agbado Central doesn’t mean the love you share should cease to exist. You deserve to keep your best friend, and we know just how to go about it.
Threaten them
Remind them that you’re the best thing since amala or jollof rice or sliced bread and fried eggs. Remind them you’re the only best friend they have in this world — even if they have five others — and if they abandon you because of a little distance, they will sleep and wake up to find you on their new bed.
Spend a day with them
We’re not saying you should hop on a plane and jet off to their country for the day. Have you seen the price of flight tickets lately? We’re just saying get on a video call and be ready to spend the day with each other like you would if you were together.
Go spiritual
You’re the only one who knows what you and your bestie have seen and been through together. We suggest you climb a mountain and pray for seven days and seven nights. Word on the street is best friends are scarce and in high demand.
Beg their parents to beg them
If all else fails, go to the people who brought them to this world, and beg them to beg their offspring to remember their love for you.
Move into their parents’ house
Since they’ve decided to leave you best friend-less in this country, we suggest you pack a good chunk of your load and move into their parents’ house. Now, you’re one step closer to them.
Send them love notes every fortnight
You could send it via e-mail, WhatsApp or pigeon. All that matters is they know how much you love and miss them.
Spill the tea all the time
Share every little thing that happens to you, around you, to mutual friends and strangers with them. Doesn’t matter how little the tea might be. Spill it.
