Let’s start from the beginning. How did you end up living with these flatmates?
Picture this: It’s 2023, fuel prices have just skyrocketed, and while you’re trying to find your footing, your landlord doubles your rent. At the same time, your job announces no raises until the following year. For me, it was either to find flatmates and split the bills or start fighting for space under one of these Lagos bridges.
I feel you. Was it easy finding flatmates?
Not at all. I needed three more people to come live in the flat to be able to afford the rent and utilities. I tried test running with a few people, but we didn’t click because of personality clashes and cleanliness preferences.
Then, one day, a mutual friend linked me up with three other people, a guy and a lesbian couple. It felt like a perfect fit.
How was it living with them?
It was great for the first four months, especially with the girls, PB and Jay. We clicked almost instantly and got really close. We would share the couch, lend each other things like rice or sugar, and talk for hours.
They were also a really cute couple, so it was fun being their third wheel. The guy, Jacob, was also very quiet, cleaned after himself and minded his business. The best part, of course, was that the bills weren’t taking my life every month.
That sounds great. What scattered everything?
The girls loved to party. They’d go clubbing four to five times a week and get back really late—from around 2 a.m. to 4 a.m. Jacob had to open the gate for them every time because I take sleeping pills, so I’m out like a light by 10 p.m. at the latest.
After a few months of this, Jacob was done waking up at odd hours, so he asked them to either stay out till around 5 to 7 a.m. when we’d be up and getting ready for work, or come back much earlier. PB and Jay didn’t take it well.
How did they react exactly?
They stopped talking to Jacob and me all at once. When this started, I didn’t even know Jacob and the girls had any kind of discussion. One day, on my way out to work, I saw PB and Jay cooking in the kitchen.
I said a breezy good morning and got no response. I didn’t think too much of it because I don’t really take greetings or responses personally, but they kept giving me the cold shoulder. It got so weird that just being in the same room with them felt tense.
Can you share an example?
Once, we had to pay a street levy but the landlord hadn’t told me about it yet. I don’t even know how the girls found out before I did, but PB came to knock on my door, and when I opened it, she stretched a wad of cash to me. I was confused, so I asked what the money was for, but she didn’t say anything. She just kept stretching her hand out with the money.
I thought it was weird so I slowly closed the door and this babe threw the money at the door and walked off. I was so irritated. That money stayed on the floor for days because I refused to say or do anything about it.
Ah. Who now carried the money?
Jay eventually picked up the money and transferred the amount to me with a clear description. I was ready to leave that money there till 2080. They filled the apartment with such bad energy for two months after their fight with Jacob.
When did you find out about their fight with Jacob?
Almost a full month after they moved out. Jacob came to ask my thoughts on if he overstepped, but after explaining to me, I was on his side. They didn’t even let me or Jacob know they were moving out. I just came home from work that day and saw that they were carrying their things, both big and small.
After two months of silence, I didn’t even bother to ask where they were going.
READ ALSO: Sunken Ships: I’m Afraid Her Sudden Coldness Means Our Friendship Is Over
Did you ever try to investigate why they weren’t speaking to you?
I think when I first noticed it, I wanted to ask them about it, but I hate the silent treatment due to trauma from some past relationships. It’s very manipulative and foolish, in my opinion. If you have an issue with me, speak like a grown up. If you keep quiet, it’s your problem, and I’ll never ask. You are not God.
I also felt like if our friendship was real and I offended them, they would talk to me instead of giving me the cold shoulder. Like we went from gossiping on the couch to not even greeting each other in the mornings. It was unacceptable.
Fair enough. How are the bills now that it’s just the two of you?
After two months, I got a promotion so I could cover more bills than before. Plus, we got a third flatmate, and she’s the sweetest, kindest, non-malice-keeping babe on the Lagos Mainland.
If they ever reached out to you to talk about what happened, how would you react?
By the special Grace of God, with silence. Let them try to explain in another life, I don’t want to hear it.
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