Music director TG Omori recently shared that his only brother donated a kidney to him so that “he could live again.”
This made me curious about how far people will go for those they consider family. So, I asked these Nigerians to share their biggest sacrifices for loved ones.
Mulikat*
My biggest sacrifice is sponsoring three of my younger siblings through university.
My parents have been retired for a while and no longer earn enough to afford to send three children to university. The first of the three gained admission while I was serving, so a portion of my monthly NYSC allowance and salary went into paying her tuition and covering hostel rent, among other things. I have two older siblings who also chip in—it’s a joint arrangement between all of us.
One of them graduated last year, but the other two gained admission this year, so we still have about three years to go. A large chunk of my salary goes into catering for them, and while it’s inconvenient, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
On random days, when I think about what I’ve done to make life more meaningful for someone else, I remind myself that I sent three siblings to university.
Raheemat*
My sister and her three kids left her husband in 2014. The man was physically abusive and dabbled in all sorts of fetish practices that scared her. One day, she called me crying saying she was worried and didn’t know what to do with her life anymore. She’d stopped working to care for her three kids, so she had no savings and was entirely dependent on her husband.
At the time, I stayed in a mini-flat with my husband and son, but I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing my sister go through so much pain. I spoke with my husband, who was worried about what it would mean to bring four more people into our house. I convinced him they’d manage, which was how they joined us.
She and her children stayed with us for three years, and while I don’t like to think about it, I believe that commitment set me back financially. Helping with school fees and feeding all of them was a lot. She’s in a much better place now, and now and then, she says, “I can never forget what you did for me.”
David*
My dad resigned because he wanted to contest for a political post, so only my mum was working and helping with the bills. I got admitted to university in 2018, but my mum had no money to process my admission, so she sold her car. She hasn’t gotten a car since then, but I’m done with school. I don’t know how I’ll do it, but I plan to set up an automobile business for her in the future.
Afeez*
I don’t keep track of what I do for those I consider family, but I’d say the biggest lifelong sacrifice I’ve made is caring for my late sister’s children.
After she died in 2018, her husband tried to get custody of the kids, but I put up strong reservations. The man is a polygamist, and there’s no peaceful relationship between his wives. He saw reason for my concerns, and we agreed I’d take full custody of the kids while he handled his responsibilities as their dad.
It’s been six years, and I can’t say he’s fully kept his promises. But I’ve cared for the kids just like they’re my own. I don’t go around saying they’re my late sister’s children; I simply claim them as mine. Thankfully, my wife and sister had a good relationship before she passed, so my wife has also taken them as her own.
Ayodele
I withdrew 80% of my life savings to support my brother’s japa dreams.
No one in my family had ever left the shores of Nigeria. It’s not that people haven’t tried or gotten close, but money has always been the problem. My younger brother gained admission to a UK university in 2022. He’d been running the whole thing alone and only told me when he was about to defer because he couldn’t make the deposit payment.
I wasn’t having it. I told him we would do whatever it took, including emptying my life savings for him. I transferred ₦7 million of the ₦9 million I had saved. I told him I’d survive on whatever I had left until he could start paying me back when he was fully settled abroad. It wasn’t an easy decision at the time—my mind was filled with “what if” questions, but I shut them all down. Today, I’m glad I made that call. My brother has paid everything back and even added extra. But above all, it’s rewarding to know that he understands how much I’m willing to sacrifice for him.
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